The following post is a part of the Indiblogger contest in association with Poonam Uppal’s newly released book-
A Passionaate Gospel of True Love : A Mystical True Love Story (English)
Here is a link to the flipkart page of the book- Click here
I think that pre-marital sex is something that is much frowned upon in all conservative quarters which is unfair because sex is a biological truth while marriage is a social one. Restraint in your sexual behaviour is advised but cannot be enforced. Just like no one can stop you from eating a bag of chips or a bar of chocolate just because they think you should be eating a salad. But then, fatty, oily food is actually bad for you while pre-marital sex, has no such repercussions (unless, of course, your partner gives you Chlamydia).
I think sex should be freed from the dogmas that surround it. And one of the dogmas is that it somehow corrupts the participants. I mean c’mon! It is one of the most beautiful things ever. Of course, there should be some discretion in who you should be having it with but that’s only because it requires a high level of intimacy and can join two souls in one. It should be given the respect it deserves but, it should not be put behind a cloak of chastity. It doesn’t corrupt. If anything, it only makes your presence of the Earth worthwhile. It is the highest form of intimacy one can share with another individual. It requires trust, passion, love, lust and desire.
My point is, I do not oppose pre-marital sex. It doesn’t mean I am saying everyone should be having sex right away but, I am saying it should be up to the individual to decide and he or she should not let fear of values, morals or society guide him. They should think about the level of closeness they share with the other person and then go ahead if they feel comfortable. Again, if they are doing it just for the sake of doing it, I am not radically opposing that idea too. I am merely suggesting how it should be done. But the most importantly, it should be done with consent and you should let yourself feel impure or corrupted once you’ve had it.
Fear is a bad teacher. It guides your thoughts away from anything that it feels might harm you. Sometimes, it makes you stay away from things you love or should love just because it has some predispositions. Get rid of fear or doubt and just let love guide you. Love is a friendlier teacher, it asks you to walk through fire and makes you do amazing things you never thought you were capable of doing.
Love will make you plan adventurous trips with your partner, go on long drives, make passionate love with him or her. Love will make your heart grow stronger. Fear will make you weak and cowardly. It will also turn you into its agent and you’ll be perpetrating the same fear that you felt.
Be a little unreasonable when it comes to following rules, especially those decided by the society and be more playful when it comes to the matters of the heart. I am not asking you to be promiscuous if you don’t want to be. All I am saying is- do not be afraid. Love with all your heart. Let your heart bleed if it comes to that, but stay alive.
The dogmas about sex being a corrupting force are more or less related to the male chauvinism where every male somehow invented the idea of a chaste female because he was insecure of his manhood. He wanted an all-obeying wife who he could govern not with love but with fear and thus came this fear into existence.
It is the 21st century and it is about time we free the society from such unreasonable fears. Let’s look at our biology and realize that sex is a natural act. Love, and let love.